How could I change my life and get more happpiness life?Not ask from others provide me a good life.I think about my future life was not normal one.Sometime I dream if I will get married with a foreign guy.I hope he will be a muslim.So I could keep my islamic life completely.I won't discuss him because of his belief.Sometime I fear I would be like some other converted muslims leaving thier belief away.Maybe it would happen to me.I can't control it.
My background is not pure muslim family.I live with my father in Chunan township.I didn't know any muslim friend here.When my colleague know what religion I had.They got shock.But they didn't believe who I really am.They look at me with some strange thinking.They asked me the first question is the man can marry with four wives.wow~This one only atract them to realize my religion.
Everyday I try to consider what I could do.It conflict with my thinking and the religion.I always query myslef if I am loyal to my religion.It's so hard.The enviroment and the people here are not belong islam.I couldn't fight to them alone.How to attract other people convert to muslim or let other muslims live in my pretty village?I didn't know.Creating my wonderful islmic life in Chunan is so difficult to me.I dream
I could build my own islamic department.It can be a mosque and a deoartment.Like a islamic community.I could buy the halal food so easiler.I could hear the sound called you to pray.That's great life what I need.Even I worked Chungli almost four years I never see that.I only saw that in TV.Maybe let it be like singer Joanne sang"Let it start form here."She sang"No need think too deep.let it start from here. lose the past.Change our mind we don't need a finish line."
Stop complaining the situation I couldn't change.Just do the right I could do.That's the best for it developng islam here.Maybe I could see that after another ten years.
Insha allah.Everything I still thanks for allah guiding.I will be there.I will be that I believe.