I love to stay with my family.I like to nestle up to my family.So sweet.I always regret my pass.Yes,I am.I can not remove that.it was just revoloving in my mind.When I saw my father he has white hair and face full of wrinkle.I felt so shame why I didn't think about his feeing.Whatever why they are a muslim or Khair they are my dear family.It can't be changed.

Everyday I think about my life.I don't care my husband in future.I never consider that.Maybe I won't get married.I just want to stay with my family.I would feel alone when I get old.If I can't be a good wife and mother.Why I have to make my own family.

I knew all my muslim friends tell me I must do the right thing that prophet Muhammad taught.I can not say any excuse for that.I just need the right time to do the right thing.Listen to the music and think about HK Singer,Sammy what she sang. I could know I waste almost of my time to regret what mistakes i made.When I got nevous I would feel my ear pain.It happens always because of my hight pressure from my nurse job.My father told me they hope me be happy everyday even I find a office job.They didn't expect me to have great achievement.I could know all their kind for me.I try to reminisce and find the real reason why I ran away to my family at my sixteen age.I was too young to consider my family feeling.

Now I go back my village and live with my family.Chunan a small towship where I miss.I am so fool I never find it is so pretty. Remenber the song "Dao Xiang"sang by Jay a TW singer what it said."Remenber what you said.The home is only your castle. Keeping running with those smell from rice plant and the river.Just smile I knew the dream made since I was a kid."At least I knew I still alive I can see all what happen in this world.Thanks allah~

Allah will guide me to a best place I can stay and live.Everyday I can pray for everybody.Nobody can realize what I thought.i can't explain it.Just do my best. 

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